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Problematic Prayer: Requests Run Into Roadblocks

10.31.2018 by Chelsea Bolks // Leave a Comment

A man is sitting in his living room when the news is interrupted by news of a devastating rainstorm hitting the area. The man’s wife says, “Goodness, Honey, that sounds like it might flood the area where we live”.

The man replies, “I have prayed to God to save me, and I have faith that He will answer my prayer”.

Well, about 12 inches of rain later, the streets are starting to fill with water. The man’s neighbor knocks on the door and says, “It’s going to be a pretty bad flood, but I can still drive my truck. I’ve got room to take you and your wife to higher ground”. The man’s wife gets up to go, but stops when he says, “I have prayed to God to save me, and I have faith that He will answer my prayer”.

Some time later, the water has entered the house, and it looks like a river outside. The local fire department sends a boat out to look for people who are stranded, and they pull up to the window. “Come on! This may be your last chance to get out!” Again the man replies, “I have prayed to God to save me, and I have faith that He will answer my prayer”.

Finally, the man and his wife are standing on their roof, water rushing by, the house obviously about to collapse. Suddenly, the sound of the storm is drowned out by the roar of the search-and-rescue helicopter. They let down a ladder and motion for the couple to climb up. The wife can stand it no more and climbs up, but as she climbs, she can just barely hear her husband shouting, “I have prayed to God to save me, and I have faith that He will answer my prayer”.

The man drowns.

At the entrance to Heaven, he is a bit peeved. He asks to speak with God.

“Father, I had such faith that you would save me. How could you let me drown?”

God replies: “What more did you want? I sent a news report, a truck, a boat, and a helicopter!”

– Author Unknown

Oh boy. Here is a prime example of a problematic prayer! In this story, even though the man was praying continuously and fervently, he never saw his request (to survive the flood) come to fruition. Why? Because his request ran into a roadblock – in this instance, his own lack of action.

Just like the man in the story, there are times in our lives that our requests will run into roadblocks. We could be praying all day every day, continually laying our requests before God…yet never see any real results. We think if we just believe a little more, pray a little harder, or pray a little longer that we will receive a favorable response – yet there continues to be only silence from Heaven.

“How can this be?!” you might ask…”I thought the bible says ‘ ask and ye shall receive‘!”

The Bible certainly does say that, but we must learn to take God’s word as a whole and balance one truth with another. Did you know that the bible also teaches that our requests can run into roadblocks? It’s true – there are occasions when God turns down our requests with a resounding “no”…case closed. For what reason? Maybe it stems from a lack of action on our parts, or maybe from another reason altogether.

Are your requests running into roadblocks? Have you perhaps been guilty of saying a problematic prayer? Let us look into three questions that we would do well to ask ourselves of our prayers when we find Heaven to be silent…


If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him. But let him ask in faith, nothing wavering. For he that wavereth is like a wave of the sea driven with the wind and tossed. For let not that man think that he shall receive anything of the Lord. A double minded man is unstable in all his ways. – James 1:5-7

Have you sought the Lord on behalf of your heart’s condition?
Do you ask God to change you for the better?
Are you continually begging Him to make you more righteous, more wise, more holy?
Are you getting only silence in return?

If this is the case, then perhaps your request is running into a roadblock…a lack of faith.

Like the passage above states, one mustn’t think they’ll be receiving anything from the Lord unless they make their request in faith! Now don’t misunderstand…biblical faith is not merely believing (as even Satan and the demons do), but rather a belief coupled with action. Faith is equal parts substance (belief) and evidence (action)…both are mandatory. (Hebrews 11:1)

Remember the man in our story? He had a believing faith, but he did not an active faith. He prayed, but then failed to follow up by doing his part. We make the same error when we ask God to change us, but put in little to no effort towards our side of the deal…

When we pray, “Lord, help me to control my temper!” yet allow ourselves to lash out at our family, we are not praying in faith.
When we pray, “Lord, help me to be generous!” yet keep our pocketbooks shut tight, we are not praying in faith.
When we pray, “Lord, help me to bring others to you!” yet don’t talk about God in public, we are not praying in faith.

As our James passage previously stated, we have a God who is liberal with His gifts. He longs to impart wisdom to us, but He will not impart so much as a drop to a double minded man, who will only waste the wisdom in his instability. Our prayers will produce no fruit when we are inactive, for an inactive life is a faithless life. Pray fervently for God’s intervention over your spiritual life. Believe wholeheartedly, but do not stop there. Look for the opportunities the Lord is presenting you with to put your request into action…

Let me ask you something. If someone prays for patience, you think God gives them patience? Or does He give them the opportunity to be patient? If he prayed for courage, does God give him courage, or does He give him opportunities to be courageous? If someone prayed for the family to be closer, do you think God zaps them with warm fuzzy feelings, or does He give them opportunities to love each other? – “Evan Almighty” (2007)

Next time your request runs into a roadblock, ask yourself: Is my prayer in faith? 

The second question we are to ask of our prayers is…


Delight thyself also in the Lord; and He shall give thee the desires of thine heart. Commit thy way unto the Lord; trust also in him, and he shall bring it to pass. – Psalm 37:4

Have you been praying for the right spouse to come into your life?
Do you ask God to bless you with that promotion you’ve been after?
Are you asking the Lord for an intervention with the enemy who makes your life difficult?
Are you getting only silence in return? 

If this is the case, then perhaps your request is running into a roadblock…a lack of favor.

Did you notice the important stipulation in our previous passage? “Delight thyself in the Lord; and He shall give thee the desires of thine heart.” Note that this is a two-fold deal. First, you delight yourself in the Lord, then (and only then) will you be given the desires of your heart. Once you have aligned your will to the will of the Master, then your desires will be worth His favorable response. If your heart is steeped in sin, you can not possibly be delighting in the Lord, thus you can not possibly expect to receive the desires of your heart. IF we truly delight in the Lord, then of course He will give us of the desires of our heart – because our heart will be seeking only after those things which are of Him!

Blessed is the man that feareth the Lord, that delighteth greatly in his commandments. – Psalm 112:1

Want to be blessed? Find favor with the Lord. Want to find favor with the Lord? Delight in His commandments! Before we go hurling our requests towards the sky, let us make sure our attitude is such as this:

I intreated thy favour with my whole heart: be merciful unto me according to thy word. I thought on my ways, and turned my feet unto thy testimonies. I made haste, and delayed not to keep thy commandments. – Psalm 119:58-60

For the parents out there, try to imagine this scenario…your child has been out of control off and on all day. They have disobeyed continually and been testing the limits (and your patience) from sunup to sundown. Every thing asked of them has been met with distasteful sighs and eye rolls. They have fought with their siblings, been moody and irritable, and downright disrespectful to Dad and Mom. Now imagine at the end of the day your child approaches you (all smiles and putting on the dog) and asks to be taken out for ice cream. Would you take them for this treat even though their bad behavior has not been truly repented of? I daresay a loving parent would do no such thing. Such an act would train the child to believe that misbehavior brings about no consequences, and that gifts of favor are unconditional. This poor kind of parenting raises entitled, self-centered, sinful adults! In much the same way, our Holy Father will not bestow gifts of favor on His unruly children, but rather will chastise them until their spirit is truly made right (Hebrews 12:5-8). Are you after a treat from the Lord, children of God? Seek His favor first and foremost, and then you may approach Father’s throne…with confidence that your request will be heard.

And this is the confidence that we have in him, that, if we ask anything according to his will, he heareth us: And if we know that he hear us, whatsoever we ask, we know that we have the petitions that we desired of him.  – 1 John 5:14-15

Next time your request runs into a roadblock, ask yourself: Is my prayer in favor? 

The third question we are to ask of our prayers is…


Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap. For he that soweth to his flesh shall of the flesh reap corruption; but he that soweth to the Spirit shall of the Spirit reap life everlasting. – Galatians 6:7-8

Have you prayed for God to overlook that sin in your life that you just can’t seem to kick to the curb?
Are you requesting that the Lord miraculously allow your errant family member passage into Heaven?
Do you beg God to make an exception, just this once?
Are you getting only silence in return?

If this is the case, then perhaps your request is running into a roadblock…a lack of fate.

We’ve all heard it before: you reap what you sow. This is what my husband calls the Law of Harvest. Whatever you plant in this life will be the harvest that you collect later on…whether in this life or the next. This is the true definition of fate! What truths God has ordained (i.e: sin brings forth death, righteousness brings forth life) will never be swayed by human cries for the contrary. God will not be mocked! It is pointless to ask the Lord to change a law that He has already put in place…

If any man see his brother sin a sin which is not unto death, he shall ask, and he shall give him life for them that sin not unto death. There is a sin unto death: I do not say that he shall pray for it. – 1 John 5:16

My understanding of this verse is that one may in good conscience pray for an erring loved one to change their ways that they might be saved. However, one may never pray for God to overlook the sin and give the person a free pass. What is meant by “a sin not unto death” and “a sin unto death”? Does this mean some sins are worse than others and are unforgivable, but that we can ask God to overlook the little bitty, insignificant ones? No way. I have said it before and I will say it again: sins are not on a rating system. There are only two different kinds of sin: the one you will repent of, and the one you won’t. It is the latter that is the “sin unto death”. The sin unto death is any sin that you love…any sin that you will allow to drag you down into Hell with it. We all have sins that we wrestle with, but here’s the test on our spiritual condition: Do we continue in sin without trying to change? Or do we have the upright spirit of Paul who served the Law of God in his mind even though he often battled with his flesh (Romans 7:14-25)? If we are not in a battle…if we don’t try our hardest…if we just lay down and let sin reign over us…then we are sinning a sin unto death. If you or someone you know is living this unrepentant lifestyle, Heaven will never be your fate unless you change. No amount of praying will change the Law of Harvest. You will reap what you sow…please sow in righteousness, friends.

Next time your request runs into a roadblock, ask yourself: Is my prayer in fate? 


In conclusion…

We all may have times in our lives when it seems our prayers are getting nowhere. We might think “am I wasting my time with all this praying business?” when we do not receive an affirmative answer to our requests. Remember that prayer is not merely a platform to state all of our wants and needs to the “Spirit in the Sky” as some may view it. Rather, prayer is an amazing opportunity to grow closer to God and mold to HIS desires for our life. We must approach our prayer time with a heart to seek the Lord’s very best for us and others, which will sometimes be in direct opposition to what we originally thought best. Let us take on the spirit of humility that Jesus had, who said “not my will…but Thine” even during the most daunting of circumstances. Next time your request appears to be running into a roadblock, check your prayer through these three tests:

Is it in faith? Is it in favor? Is it in fate?

If the answer to all three is yes, then continue to beseech the Lord with patience for His perfect timing. If the answer is no, ask the Lord for acceptance, contentment, and even gratitude toward His holy will…and then practice these virtues with all diligence. Our Father truly knows best. Trust him!

Wherefore be ye not unwise, but understanding what the will of the Lord is. – Ephesians 5:17

For God’s Glory,
CA Bolks


Chelsea Bolks is a church of Christ minister’s wife, and the home educating mother of two children. She and her family currently reside in Northwest Iowa.

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The Mission of Mankind

09.30.2018 by Chelsea Bolks // Leave a Comment

Tell me not, in mournful numbers,
Life is but an empty dream!
For the soul is dead that slumbers,
And things are not what they seem.

Life is real! Life is earnest!
And the grave is not its goal;
Dust thou art, to dust returnest,
Was not spoken of the soul.

Not enjoyment, and not sorrow,
Is our destined end or way;
But to act, that each tomorrow
Find us farther than today.

Art is long, and Time is fleeting,
And our hearts, though stout and brave,
Still, like muffled drums, are beating
Funeral marches to the grave.

In the world’s broad field of battle,
In the bivouac of Life,
Be not like dumb, driven cattle!
Be a hero in the strife!

Trust no Future, howe’er pleasant!
Let the dead Past bury its dead!
Act, – act in the living Present!
Heart within, and God o’erhead!

Lives of great men all remind us
We can make our lives sublime,
And, departing, leave behind us
Footprints on the sands of time;-

Footprints, that perhaps another,
Sailing o’er life’s solemn main,
A forlorn and shipwrecked brother,
Seeing, shall take heart again.

Let us, then, be up and doing,
With a heart for any fate;
Still achieving, still pursuing,
Learn to labor and to wait.

“A Psalm of Life”
What the heart of the young man said to the Psalmist
by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow (1807-1882)

Who am I?
What is my purpose?
When is this all going to make sense?
Where am I going with my life?
Why was I created?

These are the 5 W’s that humans have continually asked themselves from Adam’s generation, to Jesus’ generation, to Longfellow’s generation, to our generation. I suspect all of mankind will ask these, and similar questions, until the end of time as we know it.

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow did an outstanding job of answering these age old questions. Time and space will not allow me to pick apart every passage of this poetic piece in great detail, but allow me to briefly summarize the heart of it:

– Wake up! There is a purpose to life on earth.
– This temporal existence is not all there is.
– Life is more than a meaningless series of ups and downs…we are made to grow and flourish through these.
– We are all going to die a physical death no matter how hard we try to escape it.
– Don’t go along with the worldly herd. Be a soldier for Christ!
– Don’t live in the past or future. Live in the here and now.
–  Let us take heart from the ones who have gone on before us and succeeded.
– No matter how hard life gets, let us use our trials to bring others to victory.
– Work hard and never give up…it will all be worth it in the end.

Friend, you may at times feel like you are just a drop in the ocean…small, insignificant, and unnoticed. Yet you are a vital part of God’s story…the one He has been unfolding since the dawn of creation. You have a mission…you just may not realize it yet.

Who are you?
What is your purpose?
When is this all going to make sense?
Where are you going with your life?
Why were you created?

You don’t have to guess the answers, and you don’t have to figure it all out on your own. Let us look to God’s word to unveil the three-fold Mission of Mankind.


He hath shewed thee, O man, what is good; and what doth the Lord require of thee, but to…
Do justly.
(From Micah 6:8)

The first mission of mankind we will look into is the mission to Glorify God.

Glorifying God with our lives sounds great in theory, but how do we accomplish such a feat? What glorifies the Lord, anyway? In Micah 6:8, we discover that God is glorified when we “do justly“. This makes a lot of sense, because our God is a God of justice…

We find in Job 37:23 that the Lord has “justice in plenty“. Psalm 89:14 calls justice the “habitation of God’s throne“. Believe it or not, justice is even “more acceptable to the Lord than sacrifice“, according to Proverbs 21:3.

Just as “God is love” (1 John 4:8), God is also justice. When we as God’s children do justly, we are acting in accordance with our Father’s image, which we were made to represent. Thus, God is glorified.

But…

What exactly is justice? How might one go about “doing justly“? When we think of the word justice, we might visualize a criminal being apprehended and locked behind bars. They have been “brought to justice” for the crimes they have committed. This is indeed one aspect of justice. Yet in a more complete sense, justice is godly equality. Justice is a righteous equation. Are you seeing a pattern here? Justice is moral mathematics…

A just weight and balance are the Lord’s: all the weights of the bag are his work. – Proverbs 16:11

By contrast, “Divers weights are an abomination unto the Lord; and a false balance is not good. – Proverbs 20:23

As a teacher of mathematics, reading these well-known verses recently hit me anew like a ton of bricks. Weight? Balance? Why, those are mathematical terms! We all know that justice is when bad guys get bad things, and good guys get good things. This is easy to see in a practical sense. Yet how do we know these things are just? Because, with justice, just like with mathematics: one plus one will always equal two, and two plus two will always equal four. Justice is unchanging every bit as much as these sums are. We can know that a  criminal going to prison is just, because all we have to do is check the equation: Person + Crime = Punishment. If the sum is correct, then we know that the outcome is just.

Want to glorify God? You have to do justly. Want to do justly? You need to be a good math student. Want to be a good math student? You must master the skill of solving spiritual math problems.

Does our spiritual life add up with God’s word? Do we rightly divide the word of truth? Do we subtract sin from our life and multiply godly attributes?

Let me be weighed in an even balance, that God may know mine integrity. – Job 31:6

A just man or woman provides all things equal in the sight of God. A just person knows they can never deceive God into accepting faulty equations! Consider a math teacher asking their student to recite the sum of two plus two, and the student answers “three”. Will a learned teacher accept three as the appropriate answer? Of course not. The answer always has been, and always will be, four. The answer three is a false balance…it doesn’t add up. The student only has two options: change their answer to the answer that is true, or continue to be wrong. So it is with us as students of God’s word. We can accept that the sum of His word is truth (Psalm 119:60) and follow it obediently, or we can do things our own way…continuing to be the class dunce and ultimately failing. Which do you think will glorify God?

Glorify God and so fulfill the Mission of Mankind.

If ye will not hear, and if ye will not lay it to heart, to give glory unto my name, saith the Lord of hosts, I will even send a curse upon you, and I will curse your blessings: yea, I have cursed them already, because ye do not lay it to heart. – Malachi 2:2

Who shall not fear thee, O Lord, and glorify thy name? For thou only art holy: for all nations shall come and worship before thee: for thy judgments are made manifest. – Revelation 15:4


He hath shewed thee, O man, what is good; and what doth the Lord require of thee, but to…
Love mercy.
(From Micah 6:8)

The second mission of mankind we will look into is the mission to Edify others.

What does it mean to edify? Edification is the act of bettering another person…to improve their present state and encourage growth.

Edification is a primarily Christian attribute. I say this because it is not an altogether natural instinct to take interest in the betterment of others. It is natural to look out for yours truly, but it is only Christ’s spirit in us that compels us to look beyond ourselves to edify another! Our main text (Micah 6:8) says that the Lord requires us to “love mercy”. When we love mercy, we don’t want to see those we love being eternally punished for their sins…rather, we want to see them repent and turn their lives over to the Lord so He doesn’t have to take such measures. A Christian is not content to wash their hands of others with an apathetic “not my problem” sort of attitude. Lovers of mercy take the salvation of others seriously, and therefore place a high priority on edification.

Why should we love mercy? Well, just as we want to be just because God is just…we want to be merciful because God is merciful.

The Lord is merciful and gracious, slow to anger, and plenteous in mercy. – Psalm 103:8

Be ye therefore merciful, as your Father also is merciful. – Luke 6:36

Another reason to love mercy is the fact that God has made it impossible to receive mercy unless we are willing to give mercy!

With the merciful thou wilt shew thyself merciful… – 2 Samuel 22:26a

The merciful man doeth good to his own soul: but he that is cruel troubleth his own flesh. – Proverbs 11:17

Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy. – Matthew 5:7

Like I mentioned previously, we can show God’s mercy to others by edifying them. We show mercy when we gently speak the truth in love while correcting error…when we attempt to keep passive church members involved…when we engage in personal ministry…when we aren’t overly sensitive and choose instead to believe the best about our brethren. Lovers of mercy know that there’s more to life than simply looking out for yours truly…we have a responsibility to edify another guy!

Edify others and so fulfill the Mission of Mankind.

Let us therefore follow after the things which make for peace, and things wherewith one may edify another. – Romans 14:19

Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others. – Philippians 2:4


He hath shewed thee, O man, what is good; and what doth the Lord require of thee, but to…
Walk humbly with thy God.
(From Micah 6:8)

The final mission of mankind we will look into is the mission to Sanctify ourselves.

Our text in Micah 6:8 goes on to say that we are to “walk humbly with our God”. What does it mean to walk humbly? To do something in a humble manner is to do it with an attitude of servitude/submission. When we walk humbly, we are in essence saying, “my position is lower than yours, Lord. YOU are the master, and I the slave”. It is sometimes said of a female who has given her virginity over to her husband, that she has been “humbled”. While this analogy may come across as crude, it’s not all that different from what should happen to us as the bride of Christ (in a symbolic sense, you understand). When we commit our life to Him, as a bride does to her husband, it is only fitting that we should be stripped bare and exposed to our “groom” who now owns the right to every bit of us. We become humbled the selfsame day that we give ourselves to Him, imperfections and all. Furthermore, as a husband should have the right to his wife on a daily basis, so should the Lord enjoy the right of us “walking humbly” with Him daily – a continual, ongoing act on our parts!

If we want to “walk humbly” with God, we have to sanctify ourselves. To sanctify something is to set it apart – to cleanse and purify it for a holy use. When a bride declares to her husband through the act of marriage, “I am yours and yours alone”, she is sanctifying herself for her man. She is giving a message to the world that she is not available, and that she will only be humbled by her husband. In a marriage, we sanctify ourselves with a wedding ceremony…in Christianity, we sanctify ourselves with a baptism.

Know ye not, that so many of us as were baptized into Jesus Christ were baptized into his death? Therefore we are buried with him by baptism into death: that like as Christ was raised up from the dead by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in newness of life. For if we have been planted together in the likeness of his death, we shall be also in the likeness of his resurrection. – Romans 6:3-5

Many reject the idea that one must do anything for their own sanctification. The world is saturated with denominations teaching that all one must do is believe to be saved, and God will take care of all the other details. This concept is simply not in alignment with God’s word! We are told to save ourselves (Acts 2:40)…and scripture tells us repeatedly how we are to do so. Salvation is a free gift, that much is true…but just as a bride may have an all-expenses-paid wedding ceremony, if she does not show up and follow through with the ceremony and each rite it entails, she is no bride at all…but remains a single woman. In like manner, a bride who does not consummate her marriage by giving her body over to her man is no wife…but an impostor. To be a true wife, first she must sanctify herself, and then she must continue to walk humbly (in a humbled fashion). Will our heavenly “groom” expect any less?

Sanctify yourself and so fulfill the Mission of Mankind.

Sanctify now yourselves, and sanctify the house of the Lord God of your fathers, and carry forth the filthiness out of the holy place. – 2 Chronicles 29:5b

For both he that sanctifieth and they who are sanctified are all of one: for which cause he is not ashamed to call them brethren. – Hebrews 2:11


In conclusion…

What is the mission for mankind? It’s no mystery! With God’s word as our guide, we don’t even have to guess. On second thought, though, you might say that we do have to “G.E.S.” – for all of us are here on this earth with the mission to Glorify, Edify, and Sanctify. Are you with me?

He hath shewed thee, O man, what is good; and what doth the Lord require of thee, but to do justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with thy God? – Micah 6:8

For God’s Glory,
CA Bolks


Chelsea Bolks is a church of Christ minister’s wife, and the home educating mother of two children. She and her family currently reside in Northwest Iowa.

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The Significance of Solitude

08.31.2018 by Chelsea Bolks // 1 Comment

I wandered lonely as a cloud
That floats on high o’er vales and hills,
When all at once I saw a crowd,
A host, of golden daffodils;
Beside the lake, beneath the trees,
Fluttering and dancing in the breeze.

Continuous as the stars that shine
And twinkle on the milky way,
They stretched in never-ending line
Along the margin of the bay:
Ten thousand saw I at a glance,
Tossing their heads in sprightly dance.

The waves beside them danced, but they
Out-did the sparkling waves in glee:
A poet could not but be gay,
In such a jocund company:
I gazed – and gazed – but little thought
What wealth the show to me had brought:

For oft, when on my couch I lie
In vacant or in pensive mood,
They flash upon that inward eye
Which is the bliss of solitude;
And then my heart with pleasure fills,
And dances with the daffodils.

– William Wordsworth, “I Wandered Lonely As A Cloud”

Here is a peek into the mind of one who has just learned the significance of solitude. When we first find the poet taking a solitary stroll, we find him lonely. He wanders, a bit dazed and confused, without a friend to accompany him. However, in his lonely state, he notices something that he would not have otherwise noticed (had he been occupied in conversation): a beautiful field of flowers. Something in his solitude that day struck a chord in him and inspired him for ages to come. He realized that there is treasure to be found in solitude as well as camaraderie, and that his loneliness turned out to be a blessing in disguise.

Solitude sharpens awareness of small pleasures otherwise lost. – Kevin Patterson

Do you and I know the significance of solitude? In today’s modern world, it would appear that solitude is a fast-fading memory of times past. Today, we are constantly surrounded by entertainment, interaction, and activity…constantly plugged in to the hustle and bustle of our easily bored society. If we aren’t checking Facebook, we’re staring at a television set. If we aren’t staring at a television set, we’re planning our next outing. If we’re not planning our next outing, we’re calling up a long-distance friend to catch up on the latest news. The list goes on. These are just a few of the myriad of ways that we distract ourselves from…ourselves. We, as a society, have forgotten how to be alone. How to be still. How to ponder. How to reach for God in the silence. We are running from solitude…

Why?

I believe Satan has a hand in our drifting away from solitude. In fact, I believe Satan has had a hand in our drifting away from solitude since The Garden of Eden. He is a devil of distraction. If he can distract us from the truth and fill our head with his own nonsense like he did with Eve, then the battle for our spirits is all but won. In the garden, he used flowery words and big promises to distract Eve…he may be using social media, recreation, and idle chit chat to distract us, but the intent of his scheme is much the same as it always has been: to move us further away from God.

So where am I going with all this? Am I saying that all social media is the devil’s playground? Am I trying to prove that all friendship is a waste of time? Am I suggesting everybody move to their own private island and live like hermits? Of course not. However, I am strongly advising that we seek a healthy balance…somewhere in the middle of being a recluse and beaming entertainment in front of our noggin all day and night. Camaraderie is important, but so is solitude. Both should be sought after for a moderate Christian lifestyle…but one is neglected more often than the other. Let us not forget the value of time spent “wandering lonely as a cloud”, where our heart “dances with the daffodils”.

Today I would like to share three reasons why I believe in the significance of solitude…



#1: Because of the Silence

Solitude is significant to the life of a Christian because silence is significant to the life of a Christian. When we neglect solitude, we neglect silence.

Many people, especially us females, tend to spend much more time speaking than we do in silence. When we are speaking with others, it fills a void in us that longs for communication, connection, and camaraderie. Our speech is not a negative thing in and of itself. In fact, speech is a gift of the Lord! However, like all gifts, it can be abused if not used in moderation.

In the famous chapter of Ecclesiastes 3, we learn that there is an appropriate and inappropriate season for all things in life. Let us not forget that while there are times in our life for speaking, there should also be times in our life for silence…

To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven…a time to keep silence, and a time to speak. – Ecclesiastes 3:1, 3:7b

When our mouth is in a perpetual state of movement, it hinders our growth both mentally and spiritually. We can only speak about what we already know. Therefore when we are speaking, no new information is coming into the mind – only old information is coming out! If we take time for silence, it encourages our mind to process new ideas and new thought processes. It encourages our mind to expand beyond its present limitations! The silence of solitude brings growth. Consider these words of the Psalmist:

I was dumb with silence, I held my peace, even from good; and my sorrow was stirred. My heart was hot within me, while I was musing the fire burned: then spake I with my tongue, Lord, make me to know mine end, and the measure of my days, what it is, that I may know how frail I am. Behold, thou hast made my days as an handbreadth; and mine age is as nothing before thee: verily every man at his best state is altogether vanity. Selah. – Psalm 39:2-5

There are times to “hold our peace, even from good” – to just shut the old talk box completely down. At times, we need to give our tongue a rest so that we can give ourselves over to thoughtful, meditative communion with God alone. When we are musing in such a way, “the fire burns”…this silence can excite us and ignite us! When the Psalmist gave himself over to silence, it provoked him to consider the truly important things in life. Would we not be wise to do the same? We all know the popular phrase, “be still, and know that I am God…” (Psalm 46:10a)…but do we ever stop talking long enough to pursue this kind of solitude?

Conversation enriches the understanding, but solitude is the school of genius. – Edward Gibbon

It is often in times of silence that we find our sense of awe in the Lord. It’s easy to get so caught up in the daily grind of this life, that we find ourselves losing the ability to wonder. When was the last time you looked around and considered your miniature size in this great big world? Has it been a while since you had a heart-to-heart with God (outside of the old standby rote prayer routine you so often find yourself in)? Do you ever take time anymore to get out into nature (and leave the cell phone behind)? Such simple moments can be liberating…just what is needed to rewire the mind toward a more worshipful existence.

When from our better selves we have too long been parted by the hurrying world, and droop. Sick of its business, of its pleasures tired, how gracious, how benign is solitude. – William Wordsworth

Solitude is significant because silence is significant. The second reason I believe solitude is significant is…


#2: Because of the Study

Solitude is significant to the life of a Christian because study is significant to the life of a Christian. When we neglect solitude, we neglect study.

Before I begin, I want to make one thing abundantly clear about this point: group study with the collective body of Christ is a must. To seek after only solitary study would be to disregard God’s command not to forsake the assembly. That, however, is a topic for a different time. Understand that the solitary study I am encouraging is to be in harmony with (and not to the neglect of) your studies with your congregation. Both are essential, but today we will only be focusing on solitary study…

With that being said, this solitary study of which we speak is absolutely vital not only to the Christian lifestyle of an individual, but even to the very salvation of said individual! It is a sad but common occurrence that many people will base their faith solely upon the teachings of man, while never checking their bibles to see if what they are hearing is the truth. This blind trust, this act of placing one’s salvation into the hands of another, is so very dangerous! While assembling with other Christians is a blatant command, so too is the command to “work out our own salvation with fear and trembling” (Philippians 2:12b). Salvation is something we can not afford to be flippant about, and so we must make time in our busy lives for personal study. We must be like the “more noble” Berean brethren, who “searched the scriptures daily” to find out whether or not the things they were being taught were the whole truth, the twisted truth, or a total sham. (see Acts 17:10-11) They were praised because of their wisdom in taking salvation into their own hands, and not allowing themselves to be led astray by false doctrine.

Now aside from studying in solitude to prevent believing heresy, solitary study is important because it is personalized. You could belong to the most sound congregation on earth, with no false doctrine whatsoever, and you could still fail to grow in your faith because the lessons are not suitable to your individual needs. It is almost impossible for one, two, or even three or more teachers/preachers to touch on every single circumstance each individual member might be going through. However, thanks be to God, we all have personal access to the scriptures. This means that we have the privilege to let the “quick and powerful word of God” (Hebrews 4:12a) speak to us in our times of solitude…to fill in the gaps of what we are missing in our group studies.

Just as we recognized in our previous point that there is a time to speak and a time for silence; there is also a time to study in the assembly with other Christians and a time to study alone…

To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven…a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together… – Ecclesiastes 3:1; 3:5a

Remember that we as Christians are “living stones” (1 Peter 2:4-5). Sometimes we gather together with other stones to study the scriptures, and sometimes we study on our own. Bottom line, we need both for a complete and balanced diet of our spiritual meat.

Have you had your study with the Lord today? Have you met in sweet solitude with your friend that “sticketh closer than a brother”? (Proverbs 18:24b)

There is a fellowship more quiet even than solitude, and which, rightly understood, is solitude made perfect. – Robert Louis Stevenson

Solitude is significant because study is significant. The third reason I believe solitude is significant is…


#3: Because of the Self-Reflection

Solitude is significant to the life of a Christian because self-reflection is significant to the life of a Christian. When we neglect solitude, we neglect self-reflection.

Who am I? Am I living for God, or am I living for myself? Am I progressing, or regressing? Is my faith growing, or shrinking?

These are the types of questions each of us should be asking ourselves on a regular basis. Are we? Or have we filled our lives with so much interaction that we no longer check our spiritual mirrors? True self-reflection can only be found in the midst of solitude. Among friends, family, and social media, we only see ourselves through the eyes of others. This sort of external view is a little foggy at best and a total facade at worst! Others can be quick to tell us what we want to hear rather than the truth. Want a confidence boost? Just post about something you are proud of on social media, and watch the comments pour in, telling you how fabulous you are! The public sees us at our best, but Christ sees us at our worst. Who do we think we’re fooling? We may confuse the crowd, but we can’t kid the King!

Examine yourselves, whether ye be in the faith; prove your own selves. – 2 Corinthians 13:5a

Aside from the Lord, only we know the true and complete state of our individual hearts. It is our responsibility to frequently (and honestly) evaluate our spiritual condition. Solitude allows us to see ourselves as we truly are, aside from pretense and pride.

We are rarely proud when we are alone. – Voltaire, “Laughter,” Philosophical Dictionary (1764)

I think that many people, especially those who struggle with depression, wish to avoid self-reflection at all costs. It hurts to reflect on our actions and find ourselves not measuring up. It’s important to remember, though, that self-reflection is not the same as self-deprecation. When we find ourselves being overly hard on ourselves to the point of critical pessimism, it does more harm than good. Self-reflection is meant to grow, not to crush. When you find your spirit being crushed, it is time to move on from what you’ve done and to move on to what you can do to change it! That’s the beauty of self-reflection…it allows God’s grace to grant us a fresh new start. Which brings me to another season, in addition to the seasons of silence and study…

To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven…a time to break down, and a time to build up. – Ecclesiastes 3:1; 3:3b

There are times in our life to break down our character and dissect it piece by piece. Times to self-reflect, and find out who we truly are. If you find that you are less than stellar? Welcome to the club. We all fall short, but let’s not leave it at that. This is the time to build ourselves up and out of our present state…and that is truly the core of self-reflection. Find where you lack and then work alongside the Lord to bring you to the very best version of you. Use the self-reflection of solitude as a springboard to propel you to greater heights…

He never is alone that is accompanied with noble thoughts. – Fletcher, Love’s Cure (1647)

Solitude is significant because self-reflection is significant.


In conclusion…

I would like to encourage each and every one of you to find some time this next week for solitude. A little time away from companionship, from running here and there, and from the cell phone will do you a world of good. Don’t be afraid to give yourself over to silence, study, and self-reflection for a little while. Release yourself from the pressures of business – your life is more than a rat race! Moments spent in solitude are never a waste of time…for time in the presence of our God is time well spent.

Then stirs the feeling infinite, so felt in solitude, where we are least alone. – Lord Byron

For God’s Glory,
CA Bolks


Chelsea Bolks is a church of Christ minister’s wife, and the home educating mother of two children. She and her family currently reside in Northwest Iowa.

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